Omigod today is just RIDICULOUS.

Apparently my cousin Tim took the thank you email my sister sent his family after Christmas and sent it back to my whole family, but changed things to make it apply to him. He even italicized all the things he altered. It says things like: "I also love the Super Troopers DVD and Pig Coin Holder, they both smell so good!" HAHAHAHAHA! His dad's name is John but we call him Uncle Johnny... And my dad's name is Jon and Tim usually calls him Uncle Jon. But in this email he just took out the h. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH. Jesus. What a frickin genius. He is soooo incredibly funny, and just gets funnier as he gets older (he's a high school senior). I wish I got to see him more often. Also, he probably thinks I'm lame.

I asked my mom which one of her daughters she loved most and her response was: "I can't say."

HAHAHAHA. That is horrible. I told her the correct answer would have been: "I love you both equally." Hopefully she'll do better the next time someone asks that questions.

MY HAIR SMELLS SOOOO GOOD. [Go back and read that again. Think Fred Armisen in the Mayan chocolate sketch.]

I feel crazy today. My mom asked me if I was drinking, but I am not! I am sandwiched between two midterms! No hump day drinkie! NO! I'm just craaaazy. I think someone poisoned my banana pancakes.

I didn't eat any banana pancakes.

LOL apparently everyone is dying on All My Children. Now Dixie is dead, after all the hubbub of bringing the old turd back. All the ladies are leaving us. Waaaait a minute... Are they on a mysterious island or something? Because that's the only place I know where all the ladies die all the time. No? Just Pine Valley? Oh, okay then. Well maybe Zarf should think twice about that sex change, because being a woman means dying now.

Boopoopedoop, boopoopedoop. Everybody plays the foool someti-i-i-i-imes.

Gonna fail Latin tomorrow. For sure. It's a definite thing.

Kbye.